Advantages of Marriage

Subtitled: Another Disaster in Online Dating story. Previous stories here.


Marriage has lots of advantages. You have a partner to help you make decisions. There's someone else around to do the cooking when you're sick. You have someone to snuggle with in bed. And ...other advantages that (ahem) I won't get into.

But one of the biggest advantages of being married?

NO MORE DATING WEIRDOS!!

***Unless your spouse is a weirdo. I definitely still recommend date nights, even if your spouse IS a weirdo.

About a month before I met Surfer Pirate, I had met another guy on good ol' Myspace. He was the epitome of the kinds of guys they say you'll meet on Myspace. But I was newly divorced, and as my mother had warned me "Divorce makes you go temporarily insane", so I didn't recognize just what a creep this guy was back then.

First of all, he was BEAUTIFUL. Latin. Great body. Gorgeous dark eyes. Just my type. He sent me many pictures of himself. He had several tattoos, but by then, I'd realized I was really attracted to that.

I'll call him Roberto no, forget it. His name was Hector. Screw him. He was a jerk, so I'm not going to make up a name for him. I can't remember his last name, so that's enough anonymity for him.

Anyway, we'd talked online and on the phone and decided that we should get together. We lived several hours away from each other, and agreed to meet in a town about halfway between each of us. I made arrangements for my daughter to spend the night at someone's house so I wouldn't have to worry about time when I made that long drive home.

This was the first time meeting someone I'd met online, and I was overly cautious about it. When we arrived at our meeting point, I made a point of texting a description of what he looked like, what he was wearing, and a full description of his pickup and the license plate number to my family. That way, if I disappeared, they would have all the information I could give them to provide to the FBI.

First of all, he had told me he was 5'8". I'm 5'5". I wore my favorite 3 inch heeled boots (because they look amazing on me), figuring we'd be at eye level with each other. With my boots on, I was at least 2 inches taller than he was. He was also MUCH skinnier than I'd expected. He claimed to be a martial artist, and he had the muscle tone to prove it, but I still expected someone a lot bigger. As my sister would say, he was "pocket sized"*.

We'd planned on spending the day exploring this town that neither of us knew. I just didn't plan on it being so stinkin' cold! It was January, but it was supposed to be really nice that day. But there was a looming Just About to Snow crispiness in the air. We had lunch, and after freezing half to death, he made the suggestion that we rent a room to get out of the cold. (So not sneaky.) I debated, but finally decided it was better than freezing, and better than trying to figure out somewhere else that we could go and not get kicked out for loitering for hours. We went in his truck, and he checked us into a little motel. I sat in the parking lot waiting, feeling a little like a hooker. (Hi Mom! We just kissed a little. Promise!)

In the room, we watched some tv, kissed a little bit, and talked a lot. I thought we got along really well. After a while, we decided to go see a movie. At the theater, I was very self conscious about how much taller I was than him, and was wishing I'd worn something without a heel. We saw the movie Jumper (with Hayden Christensen - I highly recommend it if you haven't seen it). After the movie, it was painfully obvious the snow was coming. He tried to talk me into staying at the motel with him overnight (promising nothing would happen... yeah right), but I said I needed to get home. He drove me to my car and we said goodbye, making tentative plans to meet up sometime in the future.

I drove home in the worst blizzard I'd ever experienced! I will be eternally grateful to the truck driver who was in front of me. I stayed close enough behind him that the snow blew over the top of my car instead of directly into the windshield like it had been. Visibility was almost zero, but as long as I could see the truck's reflectors, I knew I was okay. I just hoped he could see well enough that he didn't drive us both off the road! Truly the most terrifying driving experience of my life! I was very sad to see his turn signal as we got to a town along the way, and worried about how I would do the rest of the drive without that big friendly truck. But right at that town, the road curved and the snow was coming sideways instead of straight at me. I could finally see! I blew a kiss to my hero the truck driver and made the rest of the way home with a little less stress.

When I got home, I checked in with Hector. The roads were so icy that he'd actually ended up in a ditch, and had to be towed out!

As the next couple weeks passed and Valentine's Day came around, he'd started getting distant. If you're not familiar with Myspace, you used to be able to post all kinds of little posters and things on people's pages. He made me a lovely collage of pictures for Valentine's Day - full of pictures of him. (Vanity, thy name is Hector.) Things were just not the same. After a little snooping, I'd discovered that he'd made another Valentine's collage thing for some other girl - full of pictures of BOTH of them.

It became pretty clear that he was really interested in her, not me. I was the booty call he'd tried to get until he could go visit her in Texas - where she lived. I sent him a text message that said "You know, if you really wanted to be with another girl, you could have just told me. We could have just been friends."

No answer.

I'm glad the jerk slid into the ditch that night.



A couple weeks later, I met Surfer Pirate online. He was sweet and charming and made me laugh until tears streamed down my face! Our first date was at my house where we were going to make dinner together. Within a half hour after he got to my house, I got a text message. From Hector. A MONTH after I'd sent him the last text! He was babbling on about how I needed to let it go and move on. (Uh..... that's pretty much what I did. A MONTH ago!) I excused myself to Surfer Pirate telling him I had to deal with some "unfinished business". I basically told Hector to grow up and get over himself.

Then, I set my phone down on the counter.

I took a deep, cleansing breath.

Then I turned around, walked across my kitchen, bent down to where Surfer Pirate was sitting at my kitchen table, and kissed him for the first time.

Not too long after that, he stole my heart.


If you're married, hug your spouse a little tighter today. If you're single, you have my sympathies.

...and my best wishes that you may never have to deal with Hector.


*She was almost 6 feet tall. She loved Sylvester Stalone, and was pretty upset when she discovered he was only 5'9". She said she wanted to pick him up and put him in her pocket.

Missing My Fur Baby

I had forgotten that Pirate Baby's hair has been three different colors in his young life. It was this brownish color when he was tiny, then it went red for a couple months, and now it's blonde.

I miss my cat.

When we first moved here, we had been told there was a litter of brand new kittens out on the farm. That first summer, Surfer Pirate bonded with one of the male kittens. The kitten would ride on his shoulder when he mowed the lawn out there and would follow him around as he worked.

Then, just days before Pirate Baby was born, we had gone out to the farm to let the dogs run around in all the snow. We went looking for the kitten, and found him starving and half frozen. I put him in my coat and we brought him home. We wrapped him in a blanket and snuggled with him and got him to eat a little. Over the next couple of days, the kitten and I really bonded.

But I had checked out of curiosity and had discovered certain... ...body parts weren't there. I showed Surfer Pirate and said "Look, you were wrong. This is a girl, not a boy!" He agreed, and Brave Bonny got a girl's name.

She was a very affectionate cat. Anytime any member of the family was sitting down, she would be right there on your lap to snuggle. She liked to curl up next to Pirate Baby, and it was a constant thing for a while to see me with both of my tiny babies on my lap.

Brave Bonny was never the smartest cat. She was from a long line of barn cats that were all from the same litter generations earlier. Generations of inbreeding leads to some interesting traits. Her one eye was never quite right, and she seemed a little lost half the time. We kept waiting for her to get pregnant (Captain Kitty isn't fixed), and even thought she was at one point. Nope. She'd just been pigging out and had developed a bit of a fat belly.

And then one day, Surfer Pirate got to show ME something. Certain... ...body parts had resurfaced! (Can they descend, ascend, and then descend again???) Brave Bonny was indeed a boy!

Well....

...that would explain why there weren't any kittens at our house.

But considering that she he wasn't terribly smart, we decided not to change her his name. It was quite confusing for all of us. We were constantly having to correct ourselves when talking about the cat.

But then, about a month or so ago, Surfer Pirate and I were standing in the mudroom when Brave Bonny marked her his territory. In the house. On one of the windows.

Ya know.....

the weather was really nice. Spring had come...

uh....

Let's make the cats OUTDOOR cats.

So out their food and water dishes went, on to the porch. And out the cats went.

Captain Kitty was thrilled! He has always LOVED being outside. He already knows the area, has a girlfriend, knows where home is, etc.

Brave Bonny, on the other hand, stuck around the house for the rest of the evening, hoping to be let back in.

The next afternoon, Captain Kitty stopped by to visit the family.

No sign of Brave Bonny.

After a few days, I was getting really worried. There was a light snowfall one night, and there were tiny little Brave Bonny sized paw prints going up the porch to the food dish.

But still, we never saw her him. Still haven't.

And I wonder. Does he still remember living on the farm, hunting for his food? Is he enjoying his freedom? Being such an affectionate cat, did another family take him in? Or is he simply too dumb to figure out where home is?

Captain Kitty is around pretty much every day. Some nights he sleeps in the house. Some nights, he goes out. Having one cat is much simpler than having two. And we've already decided that when Captain Kitty passes away, we probably won't get another cat. It will be nice to not have to deal with litter boxes and cat fur on everything. My mom will certainly enjoy visiting more when she's not plagued with allergies.

But I miss my snuggly little Brave Bonny.

I Should Be Sleeping

Stress is a funny thing.

The last few weeks have been utter chaos. Weddings, birthdays, baptisms, travel, and carrying and sorting through many, many boxes took their toll on me. Today was the last of a long list of major stresses. I got home and promptly went to take a nap while Surfer Pirate and my mom (who is visiting right now) were in charge of the kids.

I slept for about 4 hours!

Can we say EXHAUSTED???

It took a while to get out of bed when I woke up because my muscles hurt so bad I couldn't move. But the nap left me refreshed and now I'm wide awake even though it's after midnight.

So you, my lovely readers, finally get a new entry from me!



Aren't you lucky?????



I've mentioned before that I was the 3rd generation owner of the house we lived in, in Montana. My mother had lived in the house for 30 years. And, that house had a LOT of storage space. When she moved out of the house, she moved into a teeny, tiny little apartment. 30 years worth of stuff with lots of places to store it + no room in a tiny apartment = lots of stuff left behind.

Through the years, as she's visited, she's gone through some of the boxes. But there was still more to do.

And then we moved to ND and brought all her things with us. For her latest trip, she made the very long drive out to see us so she could finally deal with the last of the boxes. I sorted through all the boxes in my basement to get her things separated for easier sorting and then made a final count, out of curiosity.

32 boxes/plastic bins that were hers!

After two days of sorting through them, I've experienced my first bout of sciatic nerve pain (holy CRAP!!), and she's narrowed down what she wants to keep to only 6 boxes!


As someone who is trying to make life less cluttered, I have to say I'm super proud of her!


Meanwhile, that leaves me with a bunch of fun new things to look through this next week as I sort through the remaining items. I'm so excited to start digging through all the stuff! I already have 3 1/2 yards of a pretty blue fabric that I want to make a dress out of! Plus, one of my favorite things to do when I lived in a bigger city is what I call "treasure hunting" in used bookstores. And now I get to go treasure hunting in my own house!!

But the biggest treasures of all are some random papers that used to belong to my grandparents!

I have always loved to write by hand. I remember reading the play Love Letters (A.R. Gurney) in high school. I think it was the character of Andrew who talks about how he enjoys the actual art of writing - forming his letters the way he'd been taught growing up. I've always felt that same way. Physically writing words is an art.

Because of that, I have a bit of an obsession with handwriting. Technology is a wonderful thing. Electronic communication has made staying in contact with our loved ones very convenient and fast. But there is NOTHING like a real, honest-to-goodness handwritten letter! Handwriting captures the personality of the writer because everyone is unique in how they form individual letters. When I hold a piece of paper written by a person and not a machine, I feel like I'm holding a bit of them right there in my hands.

In the process of going through my mom's boxes with her, I have a little notebook of church things written in my sweet little grandmother's own hand. And I have notes and song lyrics written in my wonderful grandfather's writing! I am so thrilled to have them!

To me, they are as precious as the rarest gems.

Busy

I've hardly touched my camera over the last couple weeks. I've been getting my house ready for some visitors we'll have next week.

Ever have one of those rooms that's usually closed off, so it becomes really easy to just toss stuff in there - knowing you can put it away later when you have time? And then next thing you know, that room has become chaotic because you've been doing that far too often for far too long? That was my guest room. Not only had I been dropping the "I'll put these away later" items on the bed, but it's also where I was sorting my books for the future bookshelf. The bed was buried and the floor was an obstacle course of book piles.

Yesterday, I got the room to the point where the only things left to do in there are laundry! (My laundry sorting baskets are in there.)

I always like to have freshly washed sheets for guests, so I won't wash the bedding until next week. I'm going to put one of my sister's quilts on the bed. It's been on my quilt rack for the last few years, but its beauty can't be fully appreciated there. I'll take pictures of that room when I've got it done.

Meanwhile, I had the opportunity to sort through some boxes that have been in that room since we moved into this house. One of them was a GIANT box that had Pirate Munchkin's stuffed animals. We kept some, got rid of some, donated some, and voila! Empty box.

I had tossed some old flannel sheets down the stairs earlier in the day, and Miss Dampier had been laying on them every chance she got. The thought kept sitting in the back of my head "I should figure out how to make those into a dog bed."*

And then it hit me.

The giant box is made up of a really sturdy tray-type piece and then framed out by cardboard walls. The edges of the "tray" are over an inch thick. Box + old sheets = perfect dog bed! And so easy to clean, too! Throw the sheets in the wash from time to time, vacuum out the box sometimes, and done!


Most importantly, Miss Dampier loves it! Here she is enjoying her new snuggly bed.
I feel like a good Dog Mom this week.

*Miss Dampier has really short fur, and the floors in this old house get really cold. She spends a lot of time shivering when the weather is cold.

Silliness

Pirate Baby was sick over the weekend with a sore throat and cough. He has passed it on to me now, so I've been sick today.

He was being extra silly, playing with his blankie, and he kept making me laugh. I grabbed the camera so I could share how cute it was.

Enjoy!

Wedding Season

We have two weddings in our family this year - less than a month apart from each other. The 2nd one I mentioned recently - my father-in-law's wedding next month.

Last night though, was the wedding for Surfer Pirate's "surrogate" brother - the one who talked us into moving to Northern Middle of Nowhere, ND. He and his fiancee made it official last night in a beautiful ceremony.

It reminded me that I'm a big sap.

The last wedding I went to was for some friends of mine in Montana - just days after my first miscarriage. I was there because I loved them and I wouldn't have missed it for the world. But I was sad and very focused on my own problem while putting on a happy face for them. Before that, the last wedding I had attended was... Mine. So this was the first chance I'd had to relive the love and sentiment of a wedding.

I cried little happy tears a LOT this weekend!

Surfer Pirate was a groomsman, so I sat without him during the ceremony and the dinner, but that didn't change the emotion of the whole thing. The pastor did a wonderful job talking about how marriage means that you put the other person's needs and wants before your own (something I know he personally does - his wife is a friend of mine). I sat in the church looking at my sweet husband (or rather, the back of his head), thinking about how well he takes care of me and what a good man he is. I thought back to our wedding day and how Surfer Pirate looked at me that day and how much in love we were. I thought about how much we still love each other and the great life we've made together. And I thought about our two friends and how far they've come together and how happy and peaceful their wedding felt.

But my two favorite parts of the wedding were seeing Surfer Pirate in his tux, and the dancing with him after dinner.

I really wish I could show you how good he looked in his tux, complete with PINK tie and vest! If you knew him in person, you would know how insanely opposite that is for him. But he loves his surrogate brother and was willing to put aside his own issues with being that dressed up (and wearing pink) for him. It was very selfless and sweet and OH MY GOODNESS did he look amazing! (My facebook friends have probably already seen the pictures, and B, I'll email you some pictures so you can see too.)

And the dance! I had looked forward to dancing with my hubby. We haven't had a date night in forever, and there aren't many options of places to go around our little town. The first dance was, of course, the bride and groom, then they had a wedding party dance that was hysterical! There were 3 flower girls and 3 ring bearers, but two of them had already gone home - all day of pictures and preparation + no naps = crabby children. But the remaining 4 stole the show - especially the boys! One of the boys had already introduced everyone to his special Stomp Dance* earlier, and the whole bridal party participated for the first part of the song. Then, the kids took over the floor, the boys doing fun break-dancing and there were even cartwheels! Soon, we were dragged out to the floor for the Chicken Dance (which I've never actually done before) and the Hokey Pokey. Normally, I wouldn't have been a part of either of those, but Surfer Pirate's surrogate dad is so incredibly funny and everyone was having so much fun that it was easy to let go of your own embarrassment and just have a great time!

*aka: jumping up and down really hard

We needed to leave early because Pirate Baby is coming down with a cold and Surfer Pirate had some things he needed to take care of for his health, so our surrogate sister arranged for the dj to play Our Song (it's also her song with her hubby). So I got to slow dance with my gorgeous husband and then we even ended up staying on the floor for the Anniversary Dance. They let us dance to that song briefly, and then asked everyone who had been married more than 5 years to continue dancing while the rest of us left the floor. Then they kept adding time until there were only 3 couples left. The one couple had been married for 33 years (I think - might have been 34), and the other two couples had both been married for 36 years!

It was all a very sweet and romantic night. I was reminded of how wonderful my marriage is and how grateful I am for the life I live with my wonderful family (both related and non-related).



And I also found out that our local baker makes AMAZING cake. Mmmmmm... cake...

Pizza!

I make homemade pizza fairly often. I can make them in about the same time it takes to heat up a decent quality frozen pizza, so why not? Plus, every member of their family gets their own personal pizza with their own choice of toppings.

Pirate Baby has already shown a love for the pizzas - devouring the first one I made for him.

I made more last night, but he didn't quite finish all of it. That meant he got to have it for lunch today. So we sat at the table eating our leftover pizza together. Every. Single. Bite. that he took, he looked up at me with big eyes and nodded. It was so cute I had to grab the camera.

Enjoy!

More Progress!

When I was online house hunting from my living room in Montana, I had seen our house on the listings. I thought it was an interesting looking house, but it was listed as a 3 bedroom, so I didn't think it was the house for us. But then Surfer Pirate got talked into looking at it and knew it was the house for us. He told the sellers we wanted to buy it before I'd even seen it!

Good thing I trust his judgement.

When I said to him "But it's a 3 bedroom, we need a 4 bedroom", he told me that there are two adjoining rooms. There were doors that separated the rooms, but the sellers didn't need 4 bedrooms. They had opened it up and used it as one big room.

The doors have been sitting in my basement ever since. I've been meaning to put them up all this time, but there were always excuses why I wasn't getting the job done. My guest room and nursery have been open to each other for going on two years now.

This morning, I was awake at 3am for who knows what reason, and then I couldn't go back to sleep. My mind was plagued by the realization that I have guests coming next month and my guest room was a disaster! Trying to straighten it and get it ready was tough because there were piles of books all over the room for my pre-bookshelf sorting project. Pirate Baby couldn't be in the room with me while I worked on it because he could get hurt. And I couldn't work on it during his naps because he's not the heaviest sleeper anymore.

One way or another, I had to get the doors put up - the sooner the better.

So this morning, after everyone had eaten breakfast, I went to work. Lots of heavy lifting to get one of the doors upstairs (I'd already moved one up a few weeks ago) and into place. They don't need hinges, they just wedge in next to each other nice and tight. I went to work with my hammer and a stray board (so I wouldn't damage the gorgeous wood) and knocked those puppies into place!

They still need the molding put back in around them for a little extra security and to cut off the little bits of light that leak around the edges. But for now, they're in, they're pretty, and I've already had the chance to work on the guest room a little while Pirate Baby was taking his naps today!

So here's Pirate Baby's bedroom with the new door/walls:
And I can't post pictures of stuff in my house without doing them tour-style. The cradle above was built by my dad when my sister was a baby. He refinished it for me before Pirate Baby was born, along with the two rocking chairs in that picture. (I LOVE that they all match - and that they look so good with my woodwork!) The child-sized rocking chair was my cousin's and then my sister's.
Pirate Baby's crib (obviously). It was a gift from a dear friend in Montana who had decided she didn't need it anymore now that her kids were growing up. The dresser/shelf in the picture below came with the crib.


On to our bedroom. The picture above the bed was a challenge for many years for me. I bought it completely matted for only $5. But framing this large piece would have been well over $100. I finally just made my own frame - much cheaper, and I made many more frames after that. (This frame was my first real building job.) The small dresser was in pieces in my dad's house when he bought it. He eventually put it together, finished it - replacing several missing drawer pulls, and gave it to me.

And of course, Captain Kitty is being a camera hog.
This dresser and mirror used to belong to my grandparents. Interestingly enough, it's the same finish and drawer pulls as the one on the other side of my room (my dad gave me the other one first. I was stunned when I saw how perfectly this one matched!) The painting above it is one I did in high school, and I made the frame for it as well. And if anyone wants to buy me a flatscreen tv to replace the old-school beast on the dresser, I wouldn't complain.
We have a cute little cherub who sits in the corner and brings love to our bedroom.
And of course, our pirate flag. Some people would find it creepy to sleep with those red eyes staring at us, but we love him.
And I have to show off my heart quilt that I made many years ago. I have another one just like it that I did in purple and green.
Shoot. I just realized I didn't take a good picture of the stained glass window in this room. I'll have to do that another day.

Meanwhile, on my last "house tour" post, I left a little teaser about the... um... interesting features on my house.

Above the bay windows in the dining room and master bedroom, there are two little overhangs on the roofline. They also have a little extra detail hanging from them.

Why yes, my house DOES have two flesh colored penile details.

Fertility symbol? The world may never know.

You know you live with a small child when...

There are toys all over your floor

Projects sit unfinished all over your house

Dishes from last night still aren't put away, and more wait to be done

Your child has been "reorganizing" your dvd rack

Toilet paper bought 2 days ago hasn't made it to the bathroom yet, but is already open!

Your cell phone goes missing for hours on end
(this is after I found it, obviously)

And by mid-day, your son is still in his pj's but he's enjoying his first grilled cheese sandwich.


Life is good.

Love

Sweet image found here.

My father-in-law is getting married.

That's probably not terribly exciting news to the rest of the world, but to our family, that's incredibly significant.

You see, my father-in-law has a very prominent tattoo on one of his biceps that says "Never Again". The tattoo has been a reminder to him that marriage wasn't a good thing, and it's not something he wanted to repeat. My mother-in-law has a lot of issues, and she made his life very difficult many years ago.

So you can imagine our surprise when he announced that he was getting married now - decades after ending his first marriage! He's truly, utterly and completely in love! To listen to him talk about his fiancee, you would think he was a twitterpated 16 year old kid!

The wedding plans have been progressing and we received the announcement in the mail last week. I went online to find out on Google Maps where the church and open house are going to be. They're in my hometown, but not in an area I know very well. I was surprised to find that the open house is being held just blocks away from where Surfer Pirate was living when we were first dating. That has brought up a lot of sweet memories from those early days when WE were the twitterpated couple who used to make everyone gag with how in love we were.

I was snuggling with Surfer Pirate this morning telling him my thoughts on the subject and thinking about years from now, being the old couple (like the one in the picture up there) holding hands and still being so much in love.

Those sweet thoughts of love have been floating around in my head all day, and it reminded me of another memory from when we were a brand new couple.

Twice a year, my church holds a General Conference. It's a series of church meetings held over a Saturday and Sunday that's broadcast on tv (and the internet now) for our members all over the world to be able to watch. I've always looked forward to it because of the great spiritual lift it gives me, as well as the fact that twice a year I get to "attend" church in my pajamas! In April 2008, when Surfer Pirate and I were dating, we had just undergone a change in our church presidency because our prophet Gordon B. Hinckley had died. Our new president Thomas S. Monson gave the sweetest talk at that conference, and it was a great opportunity to show Surfer Pirate who the new leader of my church was in a memorable and entertaining way.

* To give you an idea of what a fun talk it was, he told the story of how during a time when his wife had to be in the hospital, she left a note for their children that said "Dear Children, Do not let Daddy touch the microwave, or the stove, or the dishwasher, or the dryer..."

Anytime since then, if I've needed to clarify to Surfer Pirate something about President Monson, I just remind him of that talk. He will usually smile because he knows exactly what I'm talking about. And even though he has no interest in my church, he's always been very supportive of my church attendance and activities. I know that watching President Monson's talk has helped shape his opinion of what a good thing it is for me.

Anyway, with all the memories of that sweet time at the beginning of our romance floating around in my head today, I decided to look for that talk on Youtube. I highly recommend that people watch it. I know a lot of my readers aren't members of my church and may not care at all about what those beliefs are, but I recommend watching it because of the way he talks about his wife. You don't have to share my beliefs in order to see how very important she is to him. Just months after this talk, they celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary, and it's such a sweet story of how deeply they still love each other after all that time.

You can see the video here.
(Anyone want to teach me how to post a video from Youtube on here so I don't have to link everything? I can't figure it out.)

If Surfer Pirate and I are blessed to both still be alive in 57 years, I want us to be like that.


...of course, we'll also be the ones sitting on our front porch in our matching rocking chairs holding hands with a rifle next to each of us so we can threaten kids to stay off our lawn.

In the Air

I could be doing Stupid Criminal Saturday today, but I'm just not interested.


... because today feels like SPRING!!!


It's still only in the 30's, but the sun is out and snow is starting to melt. We took advantage of the sunshine and warmer air and went outside to play today. Pirate Baby was excited to run around in his walker with his bare little feet.

Feeling Spoiled

This kitty heaven really is someone's house! I've been a fan for years! Check out their website here.

When I grew up, most of my family lived several states away from us. But I did have one aunt and uncle who lived just minutes away from us.

My aunt wanted a little girl more than anything.

She had a boy. And then another boy. And another boy. And another.

No girls.

So my sister and I were her girls.

(She's also a fellow kitty lover, so that picture above is really appropriate.)

For our birthdays, she started a really fun tradition. She would take us out for some one-on-one shopping time. I know there was a price limit to our shopping trip, but I don't remember her ever saying how much. In my head, it was hundreds. Obviously, it wasn't that much in reality. I would get to buy anything I wanted and look as long as I wanted in different stores. Sometimes, we'd go to the mall. After shopping, we would eat on the upstairs level of our mall's McDonald's (yes, our McDonald's had two levels). Sometimes, we would go to - my favorite - our big downtown department store. Wherever we went, the best part was getting to be the center of attention for that day.

When I was 16 years old, my aunt received the best news! She was pregnant with a girl!! I was so excited, you would think it was MY baby! Ironically, they moved out of state when my sweet little girl cousin was only a few months old. It was really sad, and I've missed them terribly.

And then I became an adult, started my own family, and life moved on.


Then, this December, shortly before Christmas, I got a surprise present!

In it were several beautiful things from my aunt! She had sent me some pirate theme things and some dragon theme things. (How she has remembered I was born in the Year of the Dragon, I have no idea!)

I got this really cool Pirate Ship necklace

And this gorgeous sun-catcher

And this amazing Dragon pin with Pirate elements

There was also a really nice guardian angel pin, but I couldn't get a decent picture of it.


Monday was my birthday. I've been very spoiled by my family, but I knew about everything I was getting.

Except for the two packages that showed up in my mailbox by surprise that day! My aunt sent me more stuff!!


Inside:

This adorable baby dragon necklace

This fun pirate pin

And this book*

So I feel exceptionally loved and spoiled by one of my very favorite aunts. I kind of feel like that young girl again - going on special shopping trips with my aunt.


*And no, Aunt L, I've never seen this book! I'm excited to read one that you love. Thank you so much for the sweet gifts! I love you, and miss you and I can't wait to have your newest grandbaby join me as a fellow Dragon Baby!

Smart Boy

Normally, Major Stede has a sixth sense about dropped food. A tiny crumb of soft bread could fall on the plushest carpet eight miles away, and he would hear it and come running to scarf it up.

If I even TOUCH a plate of leftovers or a pan that has little scraps of food from last night's supper in it, he's right there to make sure he gets first chance to eat it. The saddest thing in his world is when I walk past him to scrape a pan into the garbage.

But apparently he's learned one very important truth.

When Mom is eating Milk Duds and one falls on the floor, don't even THINK about going after it, because she will kill you!

He stayed very still in that position you see in the picture while I tracked down the rogue piece of chocolatey caramel goodness.

Don't mess with Mom's Milk Duds.



*And yes, Mom follows the 5 second rule. Except in the kitchen. I don't mop often enough to trust that.

One Year

Once upon a time, my mom was a young college student who fell in love with a funny and sweet man.

Life being the way it is, things happened that separated them, and they went different directions in life.

More than 30 years later, my mom received an email** that would change her life. This sweet man from all those years ago had gone looking for her and had found her through their college alumni association. They emailed back and forth for years, visited from time to time, and just generally became best friends.

**Edited to add a correction from my mom. That first contact was a phone call, not an email. She didn't sign up for an email account until after that first phone call - so they could email each other after that.

As time passed, they realized that the love they used to have for each other was still there and was growing day by day.

Then, in 2000, 38* years after they first fell in love, they decided to get married, despite the fact that his work kept him in Washington (state) and hers kept her in Montana.

*I think that's the right number. You may need to correct me on that part, Mom.

They spent the majority of the first two years of their marriage living apart. One of them would travel to be with the other during Christmas and summers, and any other time they could. They racked up a LOT of frequent flyer miles in those days!

Eventually, Mom retired and moved to Washington, and they were able to really start their life together.

As time went along, he gradually changed from "My Step-Dad" or "My Mother's Husband" to being "My Dad".

After a few years, they bought a house together, and were inspired to buy one that was all on one level in case something were to happen to one of them.

In the fall of 2005, that Something did happen. Dad's heart basically decided it didn't want to be in one piece anymore. It was touch-and-go for a long time whether or not he would even be able to live through it. The survival statistics of his heart issue and follow-up surgery were scary. He lived, but, in the time it took to rush him to the hospital and get into surgery to repair the damage, he lost enough blood flow to the lower half of his body that he would never be able to walk again.

Doors were widened and ramps were added in their otherwise, wheelchair friendly home, and Dad was able to go home. Dad stayed cheerful and optimistic as he learned how to do the things he loved even though he didn't have use of his legs. He eventually even found a place where he could continue his beloved salmon fishing while remaining in his wheelchair!

So much in my parents' lives were a challenge, but they got through it together with love and humor and a very touching close friendship. My mother, the retired teacher, started her new "career" as a home nurse, taking care of Dad's needs. Mom became a master in wound treatment as they dealt with the things that would come up from Dad's physical challenges, and was even able to teach a few nurses a thing or two about how it was done!

After a while, the continuous strain on Dad's heart got to be too much for his body. The lack of blood flow through his body affected his lungs and his brain. Oxygen tanks provided some relief for his troubles for a while, but eventually, he just couldn't take anymore.

One year ago today, February 26, 2011, Dad went Home to his Father in Heaven.

My parents didn't have an easy married life. In the 10 1/2 years they had together, over half of it was spent dealing with his health issues. But those more than 5 years were a gift. Statistically, Dad should have died in 2005. Instead, they were able to spend those last few years together, strengthening each other with their love and respect.

I feel privileged to have known him and greatly blessed to know that he loved me as if I were his own flesh and blood.


I love you, Dad. And I miss you so very much. You truly were our family's patriarch and leader. You loved us, took care of us, gave wonderful advice when needed and provided humor through all of it. Thank you for loving my mother.

Of course...

In the process of cleaning the dining room, I came across a pile of old catalogs that were on Surfer Pirate's desk.

One of them was a seed catalog I got last spring.


I started flipping through it, dreaming about the garden I'm going to plant this year.



I could almost see all those little seedlings sprouting out of the gorgeous dark soil we have here.


I could almost taste the vegetables I'm going to grow and smell the flowers that I'll plant.


I went online to order a new catalog from the same company, and searched for several other catalogs to order.


Perennials, roses, all different kinds of vegetables - even unique and rare ones.


I was SO excited for the coming of spring and the chance to get started planting.


And then I found out we're supposed to get a really nasty blizzard this weekend.



Figures.



All the pictures on this post came from Gurneys Seed & Nursery Company.